I’ve updated this post. I realised this journal is not private. And to make things clearer for others, I would have to fill in some big holes here.
You know what, I lost my wallet today. It was bad. It had Rs 350 in it. Also, my college ID and 2 metro cards. All in all, not much, except maybe my college ID which is the second time I have lost it.
But I am heart-broken! Those 350 rupees were a matter of life and death to me. I can under normal circumstances live till the end of month; it is 25th already. But those rupees were going to finance my trip for India Open – officially, Yonex Sunrise India Open 2012. Oh yes dear! That cash was literally going to be my ticket to see Saina Nehwal! My heart has broken and crumbled under the weight of sadness right now.
Now, the question that naturally arises: whom shall I ask to be my white knight and lend me their horse to go to Siri Fort Sports Complex? Not my sister: she is already cash-strapped, I had bailed her out just 2 weeks back. Not my father: he is a cheapskate and I would walk there on my own two feet (and possibly die of thirst and heatstroke in the loo – this loo, not this one) rather than ask him for any kind of money. That leaves Mummy: She is my regular but reluctant savior in these cases. This is a long story and I really don’t want to discuss money matters with you. What happens in family, stays in family! But seriously. I didn’t discussed that topic because money is a sensitive issue and the more we talk about it, the more defensive we become. Though, it is only you and me here, I have ability to engage in a debate with myself. This confuses me, my diary, and pulls me back. So I would rather not utter it at all.
Here, I left one question hanging: what was that bit about my father? Yep. I don’t like him. I possibly really detest him. He used to beat me up in my childhood. He never encouraged us children. He regularly abuses people around him. He is a cheapskate as you already know. He has no character. No real, likable character that people want, at least. He always trusts opinions of people outside the family more than us three. He has managed to kick our Babu on more than one occasion (really, just an offshoot of previous points). These are just off-the-cuff things that I can recall. Otherwise, the details are a little too much.
On the plus side, he cooks really tasty food.
So, I told all this merely to tell you that I really don’t care one way or the other about him.
The farewell today given by us for the seniors was an awesome affair. Though, I didn’t take part in any of its preparations, I thoroughly enjoyed it. But I am feeling bad here. I was almost skipping it, because I didn’t feel like it would actually be this good. I was shocked by the quality and creativity that one can’t see in our department. So, rather than bitching about the past, I should hand myself since I didn’t have the same standards for myself.
And that ends my rant here :)
– Con Anon