I have been thinking about it for some time now. i have decided to go away from here. WordPress used to be a personal space for me but slowly and steadily it has been creeping slowly into my life and has taken a strong hold over it. I can;t escape it. I tried to escape it, appease it, ignore it… but it won’t go. Yet I have the red button under my control; I can just kill this sweet monster.
Not to say that I disliked my experience on WordPress. But I don’t want to write anything here any more. You would find out upon going deeper into my blog that I have been learning German for some time now. I need to practise it; what better than writing my daily experiences in German itself? I can’t do it here; it is terrible for one and people won’t understand it. To make this blog something it is not wouldn’t be fair to it. This blog truly reflects me in some senses. I have written so many stuff here that hardly relate to each other. I love to read my past posts, but again I have so many ideas that I can’t fit them in this little space.
So I am going. I have accumulated a reader list that i love to browse through. I would take it with me, I am certain. And surely I would check this blog time to time just because I can. But to say that I need to abandon it because it is going nowhere is difficult for me. I never see things through till the end, and this post marks another such moment for me. Yet it never had a beginning, per se. It always was my companion on the internet, my e-diary. One day i realised it no longer was, and then I had decided to finally discard it.
An e-diary shouldn’t be seen by anyone. I think I am a monster because I am not, I might not even be human any more. I want my diary to reflect it. Here, I am prone to censor it, for my so-called fans. Not exactly, but just a presence makes me explain it to others. It helps it to clear up, but it no longer remains who I am. I don’t think I am going anywhere with the explanation, but the blog doesn’t satiate my hunger for authenticity. I don’t like it.
So, here it would remain till WordPress or the end of the world, whichever comes first. Enjoy it while you can. Thank you! :)